Reflecting on the Universe

So quiet. Nothing happens. The Universe is ambivalent. This we know. A great mirror reflecting back what we give. I give you silence. Ok. I give you sorrow. Ok. I give you love. Yes. The Universe says yes to love because the Universe is love. 

“I am love,” it says. “You are love too.” The Great Creator. It’s all about the love.

The love for oneself. That’s where it all begins. “What do you need, my person? Here we are, together, for these glorious, sometimes challenging days. What do you need?”

Love is the best starting point. Then? Awareness. I’ve heard they are the same. When you are aware, you love. When you love, you are aware. Try to be in this state at all times. Can you be?

Apparently the mind is so fleeting – a small child – it is coming and going at all times. Increments of awareness. Flitting in, out, here, there. One time I am on love and awareness and the next I’m wondering what people will think of me if I flub that new routine “Sweet Melody” by Little Mix. I like it, it’s fun, but is the release/contract of the ribs with a pulsing plie? Or do you just hold the plie? I must look it up.

This is my life now and I love this life. Brain/mind engaged in the patterns of some vapid but fun pop song, body/muscles ripped to shreds in the best of all possible ways by the performing of it.

It was Meatless Monday the other night, so my husband B made us risotto. My goodness, it’s so lovely, melting in the mouth, like what? Joy! Tangy joy! So much lemon. Creaminess, then the crunch/explosion of the peas. The sight of it even, so mellow-yellow, so pretty.

Nothing happens unless you make it so. You sleep, the world sleeps with you. You wake up and you see love, joy everywhere you look. In the unbelievably green blades of Grass – how can green BE that green?! Impossible! But no. There it is, shimmering right before your dazzled eyes. The blue of a Blue Jay. A pair of them, hopping happily in a somewhat bare tree promising seeds. Ah, but they’re not just blue – they are faded denim and indigo and sky blue and blue-black and a purple even. A complex blue, as blue would be too boring. Too nothing.

What about the head of a male Mallard Duck?! Have you studied this? How does He get to have such a remarkable and glorious crown, one that rivals that of the queen of England? It’s green, sure, but what kind of green is that? It’s an ungraspable green, shimmering and swaying in the sunlight, saying look, look, look at me. I’m here. King of the pond. I am. I am worthy.

“I am proud of what I make,” the Universe says. “Beauty abounds.”

It’s a search for truth and beauty Nature is on, I feel. How can I help Her in this search?

Have I always been aligned with Nature? The Great Creator? I get crabby when She does not do what I want. She’s been cold lately, stingy with Her warmth. Why? I don’t understand. It’s late April. I sat in the sun – it felt warm on my face – with my coffee the other day, then showered, put on capri jeans, a sleeveless top, bright blue, new, from GT. Flung windows open. Then She, She gave me the cold shoulder. Her skies darkened. Although it was 17 degrees Celsius, it felt like seven. I ran around, closing windows, putting on a sweater, socks, cursing Her. Why you gotta be so mean? Mother?

“I’m not ready yet,” She says. “Don’t fret. Warmer, brighter days will come. This is what’s on the menu today. Find truth and beauty in this.”

It’s harder. One must dig in, dig deeper. I wanted this, She gave me that. So? That’s just judgment. Maybe She wanted that. Can’t you be satisfied? Look at what you have! Health. A beautiful home . . . no wait! Two beautiful homes. Clothes in the closet. A man to love, who loves you. Money. Safety. Kindness. You are blessed. You are truth and beauty, so there! All is well, all is good. Stay calm. Go in peace and kindness and love and joy.

Observe with all senses. Not just your eyes.

With your heart.